When Daryl Schroeder and Tim Froese were school buddies at West Park School in Altona, they had no idea what the future held, or the unique way that life would ultimately reunite them.
“Tim and I and his brother Wayne, we were the three amigos who hung around together for a long time. Then we just kind of went our separate ways,” Schroeder recalls.
Then, about a year and a half ago, Schroeder began to feel sick. Tests revealed he had dangerously high blood pressure. Further tests revealed the function in both his kidneys was down to 12 percent.
The prognosis wasn’t great.
“They told me I had about a year. They put me on a special diet, and a month later I tested again, and it was down to four per cent.”
This led to home dialysis four times a week, for four hours at a time.
“They trained me how to do it. I have my own machine and supplies. And this is what keeps me alive,” Schroeder shares.
His only other option is to get a transplant.
“Three family members stepped forward, but because I have polycystic kidney failure, this is hereditary. So, they put themselves in danger of that, if they become donors.”
Schroeder joined the National Kidney Donation Organization and has been doing volunteer work with them.
“I have reached out on Facebook and have my own website looking for a kidney. Through all of this searching, I found Tim and sent him a message. He responded, but first I had to reassure him I was who I said I was. I described some of the things we did as kids. He called me by my old nickname, and we connected. It was about rekindling our friendship and was never about my kidney.”
But without even being asked, Froese quickly volunteered to be a donor. Their blood types match, and he is currently in the process of finding out if his kidney will qualify.
“By Christmas, if he passes, I’ll hopefully get Tim’s kidney,” Schroeder says.
“He’ll have a Timbit,” Froese quips. “To me it’s a no-brainer. When you reach the age of 66 like I have, health is everything. So, once I found out I was the same blood type, I said, ‘Let’s do it.’”
What about the risks?
“The people who run the screening are very thorough and meticulous to make sure that you as a potential donor know there are risks. If I pass through all the various tests, the rest of the risk doesn’t matter to me,” Froese says.
“I am a friend in name and now I’ll be a friend in part. And I’ll be so bitter if he outlives me,” he jokes.
His old friend’s generous response brings Schroeder to tears.
“What this means to me? It’s hard to describe the feelings. He was a friend years ago. And a friend today. We reconnected and didn’t miss a beat. I still feel super emotional about all of this, I really can’t explain how grateful I am that he’s giving me this opportunity. Even if it doesn’t work out, it’s still amazing somebody would think so much about somebody else, that they would so willingly do this.”
Schroeder adds that many don’t realize the joy this brings to the donor as well.
“If it does come to fruition, I think the joy that Tim is going to feel will be immeasurable. It’s something so many donors say: that if they had an extra organ to give, they would do it again in a heartbeat.”
Froese smiles and says, “If we can do this at Christmas, maybe even on Christmas Day, what could be better? So let er’ rip, I say.”
Even if something comes up, just going through the process is a crucial part of all this, Schroeder adds.
“If you’re donating a kidney, there’s something inside your heart that makes you want to do this. Somewhere during the process, you might get eliminated. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t give everything going forward where you could have donated. It chokes me up. To me, it will be a gift of life. Dialysis takes a lot out of you. If I don’t find a kidney myself, I’ll be looking at a cadaver kidney, and that’s going to be a nine year wait for me. That has a low incidence of success with a 10-year survival rate.”
Currently, 35,000 Canadians are on dialysis. Out of those, only 4,000 are eligible for a transplant because of eliminating factors such as diabetes or heart issues.
“I am hoping that everything will work out until Christmas, I am hoping to stay healthy until Christmas and be one of those 4,000 who will get a kidney,” Schroeder says.
As a donor, the recovery is about a month.
“The donor doesn’t need drugs after, but I will be on anti rejection drugs for the rest of my life. The donor has a clean bill of health. In fact, they found out that donors typically live longer because they tend to keep themselves healthier. You only need one kidney to survive. And you only need 20 percent of that kidney to work. So, when they pull the kidney out, you’ve got double the amount that you actually need, and your remaining kidney grows 75 per cent larger,” Schroeder says.
Reflecting on all the pieces that had to come together for this to be a possibility, Schroeder says, “We went our separate ways after school. We went on with our lives. We had families and things we did. But now, we’ve had that life. Facing the future, things start to come back together again. Reconnecting, and then to go through this journey together… It’s been almost impossible to believe.”
Following their recovery, Froese will carry on with his life as an artist, and Schroeder hopes to rebuild classic vehicles in his garage.
“It’s something I want to build on. I want to get my hands dirty,” Schroeder says, with a sparkle of hope in his eyes.
